I love having free time. It's time, that is completely free for you to do with it as you choose, who doesn't love free time? In years past, I have always been an exemplary steward of my free time. I love creating for the sake of creating, learning new things, reading, exploring, sports, and other various activities all within the bounds of my free time. However, recently I've realized that in an effort to make my free time the antonym of my work time, I've become a bad steward of my free time. Boooo me.
Now by antonym I am not implying that I hate my job, but I am very anal about my work time being productive. I enjoy what I do, and want to do it to the best of my ability and allow for the maximum amount of results with the least distractions possible while I am in "work mode". So by antonym, I mean that I've, without consciously being aware of it, made my free time: relax and do nothing time.
Now to most people, I've just described the ultimate goal in life: Relax, and do nothing. However for me, I hate being idle and even get restless. I need to be doing something. Recently I've filled that time with Netflix, reading blogs, syndicated Seinfeld episodes, etc. All things that are mostly meaningless intake and don't really improve me as a person much at all. But yesterday I realized what I had allowed to happened and got really frustrated with myself. I couldn't believe it had happened, and happened without my realizing it. Embarrassing.
So now I am somewhat on a mission to reclaim the uncared-for time I have been gifted, and to become a better steward of the ever depleting time I have left to learn, grow, experience, do, and achieve. I feel as though I have been given this time to make use of it and not waste it on my own "relaxation" time when I could be doing something that truly matters. I am learning that it isn't just about me not being idle for selfish reasons, but how I can honor God with this time, and continually being more disciplined and thus more consistent and better all around.
I love learning, I would honestly choose it over any other activity, and yet I let stupid stuff like TV, that I don't really care about, steal that time from me. I think sometimes I can lie to myself and confuse learning with work, but I know deep down inside me that's not true. Sure, learning often required me taking on some new software, exploring a new technique, creating something for the sake of creating in order to learn a process, explore a theory, or simply just to get the creative river flowing. But not more excuses, I need to do it. Now is the time for me to continue to become a better me, not to say that I did, but so that God is pleased with who I am in Him and for Him.
So here's to not just existing and going through the motions. Here's to not just living, but thriving and striving to do something bigger than myself.